Aperture Science Sentry Turret – Kit Card Edition

“Are you still there?”

Now you can be.

Introducing the Aperture Science Sentry Turret™ — now available in convenient, emotionally detached kit card format.

This model arrives fully flattened and neatly organized into color-separated cards, just like a traditional model kit. Simply print, clip, assemble, and enjoy your very own 4-inch-tall symbol of passive-aggressive security.

Product Overview

• Single-color printer friendly
• Parts separated into individual color cards
• Approx. 4" tall when assembled
• Detailed instruction manual included
• Display model (does not deploy live ammunition)

Each component is attached to sprues for easy printing and clean layout. Once printed, parts must be carefully clipped free using flush cutters (or equivalent test subject ingenuity). Glue is required for final assembly.

No press-fit illusions. No false hope. Just adhesive.

Print Notes

Some components include thinner details to preserve accuracy. For best results:

• Reduce print speed, especially for the legs. In the print profile, I have the speed reduced to 20 mm/s starting at 8mm height to help with the problems people have had with the rear leg. 
• .12mm Layer Height
• 2-3 walls
• 15% infill

Rushing may result in structural instability, emotional disappointment, or both.

Assembly

A detailed instruction manual is included to guide you through the process. Following instructions increases success rate by approximately 93%.*

*Estimate based on completely fabricated Aperture data.

Once assembled, your turret will stand proudly at roughly 4 inches tall — silently judging your workspace while contributing nothing but aesthetic intimidation.

It does not scan for intruders.
It does not speak.
It will not ask if you are still there.

But it will look like it could.

Additional Parts Needed (Amazon Affiliate Links):

Super Glue - https://amzn.to/4rrHktK

Flush Cutters - https://amzn.to/3OfoUh2